myth-myth

In the 1990s President Hinckley reminded us that women cannot be effective at two jobs, homemaker or career woman. Something always suffers if she wants to have it all. Interestingly, I watched a couple movies lately with that theme: Lucy Gallant and The Audrey Hepburn Story. Why did these people understand that homemaking was a full-time pursuit and women of today do not?

In the 1980s, era of the have it all superwoman, I too fell into wondering why I was not capable of doing more. But as I followed the advice of the prophet, certain truths became part of my testimony. I already was someone in my chosen career of homemaker. I daily touched the lives of the future of the world. I could either accept the lie that homemaking was drudgery and child-rearing was oppressive, or I could embrace it. I chose the latter.

My home became a fellowshipping center for family and friends. Because I chose not to see housework as horrible, terrible, detested work, it was a joy to make my home a place of beauty (organized, orderly, and odorless), to prepare delicious, nutritious meals, to make and wash clothes, to spend time with children (schooling, scouting, and socializing), to spend time with my husband (romancing, reading, and recreating), to learn the art of frugality, to learn self-sufficiency, and to keep a garden. I could have done these things for other people and hired out my own work. Nevertheless, the personal touch that goes into running one's own business cannot be duplicated by any employee. And my home was (is) my business.

Since homemaking had its uniform of greasy haired ponytail, sweats, and old t-shirts, I understood why so many looked at homemakers as stupid second-class sheople.  Intelligence does not exude from such an image. Therefore, I needed a makeover to validate my career. I was never the greasy type, but my wardrobe was lacking. Out went everything that was grungy or ill-fitting.  Daily grooming became a greater part of my schedule. Working with children, in the garden, and on my hands and knees might require functional clothing, but I need not look slothful. Part of being feminine is wearing dresses and skirts (Deuteronomy 22:5). Paintings of women in by-gone eras,  when woman's work was deemed valid, never depicted them in pants. William Waterhouse and others even up until the 1950s show women working and just plain living in skirts. I know this is an unusual viewpoint at this time, but when has God's word ever been popular.  I feel every bit as professional in my well-groomed style of  A-line skirts and modest blouses, as any wall-street woman in a power suit. Before I discovered this truth, I did the same in slacks. Nevertheless, the difference of working in skirts is unequaled.

Educating my children at home required me to educate myself. Once again proving that homemakers are not unintelligent, I taught every topic under the sun by staying one lesson ahead of my children and their many friends who joined our school. I became a scriptorian and scholar to some degree and continue now that the children are grown to seek out the best books. Youth and many mothers around the world have been mentored and guided at my hand.

One last obstacle remained. Those feminist ideas learned through years of public schooling and societal indoctrination kept a little irritation in the back of my mind. Add that to the Biblical interpretation of womanly submission  of many traditional Christians--I was confused. I certainly felt equal to my husband and am not the submissive type. The Family: A Proclamation to the World opened my heart and quieted my rebellion. Husband and wife are equal partners in marriage with different responsibilities. I did not need to fight against my husband, who never wanted to rule over me anyway. I only needed to accept the responsibility to communicate, compromise, and be a companion  with him. Since then things have gone remarkably well.

So now that I'm the aged woman spoken about in Titus 2, I seek out younger women to mentor. I want them to understand that loving their husbands and children as keepers of the home is a vital and fulfilling career. Hopefully, as I seek to inspire them, my little corner of the world will produce a new generation of homemakers that fully embrace the beauty of the profession.